Gift Giving

Hello, and welcome.

Christmas offers a wonderful opportunity to get together (safely!) with loved ones. But for many, Christmas is also an anxious time financially. You may worry whether you can afford the gifts, the special meals, perhaps the travel costs involved.

In this post I want to focus on gift giving. Healthy gift giving is altruistic—it’s a selfless act, intended entirely and only for the wellbeing of the recipient. However, although healthy gift giving is carried out without expectation of personal gain, you’ll be surprised how much you will gain. Stephen Post at Case Western Reserve in Ohio has studied altruism and concludes that ‘a strong correlation exists between the well-being, happiness, health, and longevity of people who are emotionally and behaviourally compassionate’.

To make your gift giving as beneficial as possible for everyone this year, here’s what to do:

Instead of giving only to those you feel you ‘should’ give to, make a more thoughtful list. Whom do you really wish to bring joy to this year? And when considering those to whom you feel obliged to give, think about the good things they’ve done over the past year—for you or anyone else—that makes you want to give them some positive recognition of their importance to you.

Try to ensure each gift is a ‘good fit’ for the recipient. You can do this either by noting what gifts they give to others (often this is a good indicator of what they would like for themselves), or by imagining yourself in their shoes for a day and thinking about what would enhance their life.

Respect your budget. Don’t overstretch yourself, or you may feel resentful when you give. A small thoughtful gift will be enjoyed far more than a costly one that’s given at huge personal cost.

Finally, and most important of all, give a gift that reflects your thoughts and efforts. Kahlil Gibran, in his wonderful book The Prophet, says it best:

‘You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.’ 

Until next time,

Linda